Our inner voice…
‘The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice.’ Peggy O’Mara
Have you ever stopped to think about how we got our inner voice? How it might be attached to our self esteem. Why do we see the world the way we do? How come we we work for a salary? Did our Dad work for a salary? Is there a reason why we stay in our home town all our life? What did you learn from your parents? Did you listen to what they told you? Did you observe their behaviour? What part of your upbringing had the greatest influence on you? Is this why we do the things we do? Think about it. What do you tell your self? Do you have positive or negative self esteem?
I found this quote on face book and wondered who Peggy O’Mara was and I found out she was the former editor and publisher of Mothering Magazine.
Check her out, here is the link to her latest video and website.
Thinking about our inner voice.
It got me thinking about our inner voice and the effect it may have on us… the conversations we have with ourselves.
First of all let’s be straight: I am not giving parents a hard time here, we are all human with our discrepancies and imperfections. There are no degree’s at our universities that train us to be the perfect parent! We do tend to parent as we were parented and many of us might either learn from the examples we experienced and parent differently or follow the same path. There are no rules and most parents try to do their best with the tools they have. I am a parent, I am sure my children have both positive and negative things to say about their upbringing!
In music we talk about inner hearing, giving ourselves time to hear inside our head a part of the music we have heard before, which might aid, with either memorising a part of a melody or giving a moment of silence to the music. Our inner voice, I think works a bit like that too, but it is not the music you memorise. It is the talk around us that is assimilated, over time and it would seem there are
inner voice repercussions for us as we are nurtured through this growing process. The effects of this family scripting mould us into the people we are today, they become a part of our DNA… part of the family tradition. There is nothing wrong with that. It is what we choose to do with the person we are, having experienced these influences, that is interesting.
Should we change our inner voice?
We all have this inner voice. We can either move through life unaware of the family scripting we have experienced and live our life accordingly accepting both the positive and negative or we become aware and decide what we will keep and what we will change. This is a conscious decision and can be very confronting, it takes courage to tackle that little voice within and say.. enough. I am not listening to you any more and I am going to change.
A positive and negative inner voice.
For me, the biggest challenge was that little voice that said.. I wasn’t good enough… any one else had that? Boy… have I worked on that one. Read books, gone to workshops, listened to tapes, meditated, even gone to India to an ayurvedic treatment centre. Of course it was not just for that
little voice inside… but to explore “me” as a person too. There is so much to learn, not just about the lessons from school but who we are as “ourself.” I am not sure that we often give ourselves the opportunity to explore those personal possibilities. Should this become a lesson in the classroom, in our schools? Should our well being… our self esteem…what our inner voice tells us, be discussed? (Actually, I know there are programs in schools addressing these issues more and more.) Still we can ponder… What is the inner voice in our head telling us? Should be talk about it? Do we need to be ready to listen to change? There are lots of questions. What do you think?
Be kind to your self.
Life is about taking what we have and building on it and you are never too old to learn. My father always said that you must teach your children to be independent and I would add,to know your self as well. That is a life long journey.
Just a few thoughts. Be kind to your self.
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Thanks so much for dropping by.